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Did u ever go inside psychatric patient mind???? have a look to it
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The following first person account of schizophrenia, written by a young women(by her self) ,evabourate some features of her world with her disorder....... have a look as a humen being to her ...read carfuly every single word...may be u can feel and understand her more...
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Can i ever forget that iam schizophrenic???? iam a gost within my self,aspirit no one knows , long time ago when we locked us up forever ,perhaps they were so wrong. what good is physical freedom if the humen feelings are trapped ,unable to escape???
The most wearing aspect of schizo is the battle that goes on inside my mind&head in which can conflicts become irresolvable. iam so ambivalent that my mind can divide on a subject & those two parts subdivide over and over until my mind feels like it is in piceces and im totaly disorganized.
At other times i feel like iam trapped inside my head, banging against it walls, trying despretely to escape while my lips can ulter only nonsense. Recently, my mind has played tricks on myself, creating the people inside my head who sometimes come out to have me and to meet me. they surrounding me in my room, hide behind trees and under snow outside. they scream at me in my room and devise plane to break my spirit. the voices come and go , but the people are alwayes there , alwayes real....
Life for most schizophrenics is anightmare full of fears and douts about reality , they have adistorted view of that most profound questions of how they retate to world around them. Boundries become unclear and other people are fightening and not to be trusted. thus they made things which could bring relife closeness to other people is shunned as something horrible and dangerous......
Living day to day is a challenge , because its just simply hard for schizophrenia to live a world that is troble to some to them . my fears are so intense that i do most things i must pass through a "wall of herror" that stands between myself and my goal. leaving the house ,talking to some one , or taking a walk can creat panic , simply because i do not feel part of the world. its a forigen place to me. since my childhood i have felt like an out sider looking in . schizophrenic is not just a illness , its a way of life and it is a life constantly disrupted by symptoms.......
Iam suffering.... , the best source of relief is other people who are patient enough to help me through my time of UNRELITY......
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