Two Cow Explanation

The "Two Cow Explanation" of what makes...

A Communist You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.

A Socialist: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

A Republican (Conservative): You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?

A Democrat (Liberal): You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.

A Fascist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.

Democracy, American Style: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.

Capitalism, American Style: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

Bureaucracy, American Style: You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain.

An American Corporation: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A French Corporation: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

A Japanese Corporation: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.

A German Corporation: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

Sudanese Style: You have two cows. the government takes both of them and put you in jail.

Abureesh
Is seems that you are the only one here who has sense of humor
thank u

An Italian Corporation: You have two cows but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A Russian Corporation: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A Mexican Corporation: You think you have two cows, but you don't know what a cow looks like. You take a nap.

A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows, none of which belongs to you. You charge for storing them for others.

A Brazilian Corporation: You have two cows. You enter into a partnership with an American corporation. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American corporation declares bankruptcy.

An Indian Corporation: You have two cows. You worship them.

Quote: A Fascist: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage

يا سلام يا اسمارتى بوست ظريف.. عجبنى الفاشستى .. واتخليتا
اذا كان الزول عنده جنسيتين بدل البقرتين.. وعجبتنى انه الزول ينضم للاندرقراوند ويخرب...

شكرا د.بيان
حقيقى وجدتها معبرة جدا

Taliban: You have two cows. You turn them loose in the Afghan "countryside" and they both die. You blame the godless American infidels.

Canadian: you tell your bank to come and get their stinkin' cows, they do and sell them back to you as hamburger with mind altering drugs in it.

Catholic: You have two cows. You put one into the manger scene and stuff the other one, paint it gold and put it into your museum.

Jewish: Their country is two rocky for two cows so they start a web site instead?

New Yorkers: They disguise their cows as eastern taxies and turn their exhaust into powdered milk and sell it to gangs to cut their cocaine with.

Californians: They raise their taxes on their two cows so high, that the farmers have to melt all their cows down into milk cartons and sell them for advertising.

Australia: They were running out of Kangaroos so the environmentalist made everyone cut off the two front legs of their cows and rename those Kangaroos and outlawed meat milk and cows

Africa: The government had to hide their only two cows because the natives kept poking holes in them for the blood. The government didn’t mind this but they needed the blood for transfusions for their politicians

A Chinese corporation: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them.

A Mexican corporation: you have two cows. Some politics begin to argue you got those cows illegally. The whole legal Mexican system begins to work against you. You got arrested and put in jail. The cows now belong to those politics.

An Israeli corporation: there are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?

An Arkansas corporation: you have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute...