Date: Fri, 13 May 2005
Dear Elhadi Adam Elomda "[email protected]"
I have read your article on sudaneseonline.com titled "Should Polygamy be on the Liberation War Manifesto?"
I have been filled with confused and dismay.
Of course on the none-violent war of women against inequality it is not surprising if the liberal men and women have clearly written this in their none-violent war manifesto. Women have suffered from the divided love of a man in his relationship to woman in the name of false notions like better for the children or it has got more to it than it meets the eye.
What I find confusing is that you are trying to mobilise the homophobic sentiments to justify polygamy, which is really cheap shot. I think if you have homophobic issues then they need to be discussed in separate platform.
I wish I were a woman to tell you know why is should be part of the liberation war of women and men, but listen to this,
§ Marriage is about sharing life between two people, I am not sure how difficult to share your life with one person let alone more than one, two, three or may be four (the Muslim would say) may be more them of other faith would say.
§ Talking about double speak, marrying more then one wife and having to achieve equality and justice among the wives. This is not possible as people do have emotions and this is a fundamental part of human beings life. The dependence of the couple on each other emotions would make what you say as clear nonsense, especially many of the polygamy practitioners are Muslims.
§ Interesting that you think men with several wives will make good fathers. How it come a man with extreme self interest can make a good father, and I can assure you when he finished with battle of the wives he will have very little energy to care and share his emotion with his children. Not to miss that, the children become part of the race of the wives to gain the attention of the man.
§ In short when you go for another wife, you have lost the respect for the person you decided to share your life with.
In support of the manifesto of the liberals, all equality of man and women are worth fighting for, because if we do not we will rot in the degradation of inequality.
As I am writing to you I was hoping that I have misunderstood your article, if I have not, hope this will change the conclusion of your article.
It make me laugh/cry when the war mongers in Sudan say we are fighting for equal share of wealth and power and right in their home there is no equal share of wealth and power.