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A POEM
10-05-2009, 07:51 PM |
Suliman Tibin
Registered: 06-17-2011
Total Posts: 0
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A POEM
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When tired and in a mood to scribble, try your hand at poetry. In verse, the human brain functions in snapshots and scampers away like a scared rodent...here is a doodler's attempt... a poem
A RAW WAR
From Troy to Babylon, What a stressful journey, For the Army cook! To make it worse, I lost my "Cook Book". Gone with it to oblivion: All secrets of colorful recipes, For marauding troops. Once, I was learned in the art of: How to pickle the rustic soul, or ferment the spirit of a barbarian peasant With a single touch of my civilized hand, Change meat to vegetable, Vegetable to meat or even clam if so you wish! Supply and demand. That's on land. Whereas at sea, I can tame the shark, deflower mermaids, and rule over the rest. Just go and get me my lost "cook Book"
(Edited by Suliman Tibin on 10-05-2009, 09:27 PM)
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11-04-2009, 12:29 PM |
Osama Mohammed
Osama Mohammed
Registered: 04-02-2008
Total Posts: 4619
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Re: A POEM (Re: Suliman Tibin)
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Dear Suliman,
The title of the poem is very ( smart) the smartness of the poet is seen in many places which gives the poem a scent of artificial well presented language . Nevertheless, it is important (to me) to know if the writer’s first language is English or not . The language seemed to be purified, chosen carefully, sophisticated and addressed to certain group of people More to say , I like the way you find the approach to connect the main idea to the body of your poem ..I mean It didn’t seem like a maze or puzzle to figure out what you are introducing in your poem ……
Thank you for injecting new blood in the English Forum ..
Osama
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11-06-2009, 06:02 PM |
Suliman Tibin
Registered: 06-17-2011
Total Posts: 0
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Re: A POEM (Re: Osama Mohammed)
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Ustaz Osama, Thank you so much. I'm really honored by your review of my humble attempt at writing poetry. I do appreciate your positive feedback and invaluable comment. English isnt't my first language- I'M STILL LEARNING- but I've been using it as a medium of communication in my professional life for almost three decades. Some of my poems in English were published in anthologies here in the U.S but I haven't tried submitting any publishable works in Arabic for the obvious reason: it's hard to. I would if I could. I personally think,(you may disagree with me Osama),in comparison to Arabic, writing in contemporary English is much easier in terms of diction, technique, rhetorical flexibility and fluency. Verbal gymnastics would be fun in most modern European languages including English but could lead to facial contortions from your average Arabic language editor/reader and possible unfavorable reviews by over-zealous critics. In Arabic, convention dictates that you've got to be well versed in classical Arabic to produce a work of reasonable literary erudition. Our modern life with its hectic schedules is too short for that I think. Thanks a lot Ustaz Osama
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